When I first began trying to Create My Day and allow my Real Self to run my life, I was expecting physical, emotional, and spiritual changes.  I was, in fact, looking forward to them!  They would serve as my indicator that I was making some progress.  My old self and old way of living definitely needed to go.  I was ready for anything that came my way, or so I thought.

In preparing myself to apply what I had learned about being my own Creator, one of the many things  I did was a whole lot of reading.  One person that I read about who has already taken this ‘journey’ sticks in my mind.  I don’t remember her name, but I do remember her description of what happened to her as she began to Create her Day.  She said that she was very disoriented, and struggled to maintain control of herself.  She said it scared her!  I couldn’t imagine why.

Well, I learned.  The first couple of days were mildly disconcerting.  I did not totally accomplish a complete ‘turn over’.  My ego slipped in and I allowed it to run the show like it was used to doing.  It was ‘familiar territory.’  I was determined to keep trying, however, and yesterday I learned what the aforementioned writer meant!  I was off-kilter, to say the least.  I was uncomfortable, unhappy, short-tempered with my world…a real pleasure to NOT be around.  And then I got thoroughly depressed!  Nice.  The unhappy camper sent herself to bed early after crabbing to one person too many.

Then, when I woke up today I did my routine, again.  THIS time, when I put my feet on the floor I had the strangest sensation….I REMEMBERED WHO I USED TO BE.  I was back!  I have been ‘gone’ for about 40 years, and having Me back reminded me of how much I missed that person.

All day long I have been enjoying the trip.  I see things differently.  Food tastes better.  My cats are even more fun!  Best of all, when the crappy troubling events of the day before started re-entering my reality for another shot at me, I very quickly and quite successfully dealt with them.  Then, the rest of today was completely devoid of any more of the previous day’s grief.  I dispatched calls, bills, and chores with no problem.  I can’t say today made yesterday’s internal struggle worth it, but that slice of hell certainly was an excellent “learning experience.”

The reason I am up at 3:00am writing this is because I realized I had forgotten to warn anyone trying to learn to Create Their Day that there can be some hard parts during the adjustment.  I didn’t include that possibility in my last 3 blog entries because I have never experienced this before, so I had no idea what it was or what it felt like.  If you remember, I said I was just starting on this path myself, so a lot is new to me, also.  I will share whatever experiences I have as soon as possible, from now on.

I hope this warning is in time to prepare anyone else who finds themselves going through this troubling phase.  Just persevere, and it does get better, I promise.  My apologies for not being quicker.  My Bad.

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